Lesson On Forgiveness
The only constant childhood memory that rushes into my mind is always one scene. The scene never changes and has been carved into my mind all along. It had a greater impact on shaping the person that I am now.
Being brought up by an alcoholic father was nothing short of terror, especially in our patriarchal society. From the days , I could remember, we dreaded the time when he approaches home. The endless beatings and verbal abuse that was given to my Mother instilled fear and loath into our heart. Being married at the young age of 18, did not give my Mother many options to leave him. She hung on for the sake of us, for the sake of society, as she feared she will never be accepted if she leaves. The fear for the future of our lives, gave her strength to endure the pain and suffering for years.
I remember questioning her on why she is not taking the courage to leave and was silenced by the painful look she gave me. I knew then and there that she had taken the decision to bear the sufferings and nothing could deter her from there. The only thing that she wanted was our safe future and for that she forgot to look after her-self.
As, we grow , she found her voice coming back. She gained some strength the day , I stood up to face my Father, Of course, I was offered all the beatings but that day she realized , she needs to move on and stand up for herself.
The path was not easy, but she made small strides towards self improvement. Time is the biggest wizard. Eight months into my marriage, my Father fell down with paralysis, making him completely depended on my Mother. Of course, people advised her to leave him in some nursing home and to live her life , but she didn't. The words my Mother told me that day, will be etched in my heart for ever, "Yes my dear, he has wronged me, abused me, but I Forgive him!! The person right now in front of me is only a human in need of help."
It changed my life. The bitterness that I had carried all along to my Father, to relatives, to friends and to everyone. The power of her forgiveness, gave me strength to forgive myself.
I know, there are many individuals like me , who has gone through some sort of abusive child hood. All I have to say to them is only one and one thing , please forgive yourself and heal within. There are no storms that do not pass. Ultimately, we all will see light at the end . You are a survivor and you will always survive.
Being brought up by an alcoholic father was nothing short of terror, especially in our patriarchal society. From the days , I could remember, we dreaded the time when he approaches home. The endless beatings and verbal abuse that was given to my Mother instilled fear and loath into our heart. Being married at the young age of 18, did not give my Mother many options to leave him. She hung on for the sake of us, for the sake of society, as she feared she will never be accepted if she leaves. The fear for the future of our lives, gave her strength to endure the pain and suffering for years.
I remember questioning her on why she is not taking the courage to leave and was silenced by the painful look she gave me. I knew then and there that she had taken the decision to bear the sufferings and nothing could deter her from there. The only thing that she wanted was our safe future and for that she forgot to look after her-self.
As, we grow , she found her voice coming back. She gained some strength the day , I stood up to face my Father, Of course, I was offered all the beatings but that day she realized , she needs to move on and stand up for herself.
The path was not easy, but she made small strides towards self improvement. Time is the biggest wizard. Eight months into my marriage, my Father fell down with paralysis, making him completely depended on my Mother. Of course, people advised her to leave him in some nursing home and to live her life , but she didn't. The words my Mother told me that day, will be etched in my heart for ever, "Yes my dear, he has wronged me, abused me, but I Forgive him!! The person right now in front of me is only a human in need of help."
It changed my life. The bitterness that I had carried all along to my Father, to relatives, to friends and to everyone. The power of her forgiveness, gave me strength to forgive myself.
I know, there are many individuals like me , who has gone through some sort of abusive child hood. All I have to say to them is only one and one thing , please forgive yourself and heal within. There are no storms that do not pass. Ultimately, we all will see light at the end . You are a survivor and you will always survive.
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